Tuesday, 13 December 2011

Broken free from the Rabbit hole...

I have done it. It wasn’t pre-planned but when the idea appeared I just went for it. I regret nothing. I have deactivated my Facebook account. This is big news! Surely everyone I have ever met and added NEEDS to know everything about my life. The nights out I didn’t invite them to (talk about rubbing it in!) Here are 10 pictures of me having a great time only miles away from you and you didn’t even get a text message from me beforehand. We are definitely drifting into the arena of the unwell when it comes to personal relationships on a grand scale.

Facebook is like the online transparent diary. Nothing is hidden, nothing private, as soon as you commit and add, tag or invite someone you are open to judgement and comments each step of the way.

Twitter is equally all encompassing although with 'tweeting' there is no turn around or lengthy wait for a reply or response. It’s more like writing a comment down reading it aloud and then throwing it in the abyss. With limited characters and space available each tweet is like a 21st century toilet cubical piece of graffiti, the only difference being that it’s your own toilet and your own thoughts (although if you can’t think of anything funny to say you can simply ‘re-tweet’ or steal someone else’s crack and casually pass it off as your own while crediting fully.)

How will I manage without Facebook? This was the sick fleeting thought that entered my mind as I re-entered my password confirming the total reversible decision I was about to make (after all they want you to come back and what better way to ensure that than to give you a little wink while deleting your page) the message pre-confirmation read “don’t worry we’ll just put it on hold for you in case you change your mind”. The intoxicated online profile junkie will never be free.

Should you really know that much about everyone you know? Obviously it’s useful to know their birthday, anniversary and telephone number but if you were really that close friends surely you’d probably know that anyway. The guy you met at work, do you really give a fuck which School they attended? Their Favourite foods in top 5 order? A comprehensive list of films, music and books they like? Who cares? Where has the art of conversation on a night out gone? When you meet your pal’s on a Friday night for a quick drink do you find yourself sitting in silence nursing a flat pint because everything remotely interesting that has happened to you in the past week was told in real time via your mobile.

I will probably flake out and return with my cyber tail between my legs, but for now let us imagine a world where there was still some mystery to people and their lives and the drabness of the reality wasn’t published in a fancy font and surrounded by a wallpaper of their choice.

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