Wednesday, 22 February 2012

Moon, spoon, June...

After watching The Brit Awards 2012 and hearing some truly lame music from the 'winners' and 'nominees' it did get my mind whirring into overdrive about some of the worst lyrics committed to tape in the name of song. The first one that started my ears twitching was during the evening when Noel Gallagher sung that he was going to "take that tiger outside for a ride"...I see. Long way from 'Cigarettes and Alcohol'.

Here are a few other choice lines from artists that are in some cases universally loved ones, but have still managed to slide a few stinkers under the radar.

Your Song - Elton John = The offending line "If I was a sculptor, but then again no"...what! Are you manually changing the lyrics of the song as you're singing them? Like a audio black marker pen scribbling a line out as it leaves your lips.

Don't Pass me By - The Beatles = The offending line "I'm sorry that I doubted you, I was so unfair, You were in a car crash, and you lost your hair"... Good to see Ringo's bedside manner has improved over the years as getting the 3rd degree from him while you lie in casualty seems the least of your worries.

Freakin' Out - Graham Coxon = The offending line "Nothing to prove,nothing to say La la la la la la la lay"...Damon wept.

Jailbreak - Thin Lizzy = The offending line "Tonight there's gonna be a jailbreak somewhere in this town"...well,well...where could that possibly be? A jail perhaps?

Wiggle Wiggle - Bob Dylan = The offending line "Wiggle,wiggle,wiggle like a bowl of soup"...the man that penned "The hollow horn plays wasted words, proves to warn, that he not busy being born, is busy dying" is submitting songs about soup is quite a kick in the balls.

and we finish here where we started with the governor, ladies and gentlemen Noel Gallagher.

I Can See A Liar - Oasis = The offending line...lets just say the whole song and be done with it. Gems such as "I can see a liar, sitting by the fire, trouble in his heart, laughing at the thought."..."Coming as he goes into overdose, I wonder what he feels to me"...beyond apology and something that should be buried in the north sea in a concrete box so that it's never heard again.

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